The Definition of an American "Thug"

 photo download_zps9ec95a46.jpg

I write these things to clear my mind and find some kind of peace. Most of the stuff you will find here lately had nothing to do with writing erotica nor romance nor the many machinations of attempting to be what I so obviously AM.


That said, let me give you the definition of a thug according to Fox News and the American media system, which, like in Orwell's 1984 seeks to create a monster for all to fear in order to keep the populace focused on things that don't matter while the rich control us all like puppets and force us to dance their little dances for crumbs and table scraps.

In Orwell's 1984, there was a big monster. This monster was the thing that people were taught to fear. I read the book a very long time ago, so I don't recall every delicious, horror-inducing, oh-you-brilliant-sexy-writer, word. The populace was at war with someone and that person wasn't real--that is what I remember and that is what I want to use in an effort to talk about this monstrous 'thug' that we are all taught to fear no matter what color we are.

The dictionary definition of a thug is this: A cruel, vicious ruffian, robber or murderer.

This is the picture that Fox News employs. We are taught so well to hate the thug that if such a creature turns up on our doorstep in the middle of the night seeking aid and assistance because they've been in a terrible car accident and manage to, mercifully, stumble out of the wreckage alive -- we shoot them. Before we call the police, before we do anything else, we shoot these MONSTERS.

A lot of people want to call this racism.

Correction: This is definitely racism. The absolute BANE of the planet earth.

And, to a certain degree, it is. But, more than racism, it is the Orwellian fear (carefully taught by RACISTS) of the monster that we've been carefully taught to hate. We kill IT because all our lives we've heard terror stories of what IT will do to us if we don't.

There are many stories like this and there will be many more. Just like there are stories of police corruption where thugs are shot down for little to nothing by cops with nothing to lose by doing so. Rabbit Season. Duck Season. Thug Season.

It actually shocks me how ready some people are to kill someone else--but that, in itself, is another story for another time.  And one that deals with the mournful disconnect of one human being from another on a global scale -- a near complete lack of compassion and empathy for other human beings, and, therefore, truthfully, for SELF. 

But one should not waste sympathy on a thug. A thug is, by definition cruel, vicious. He will rob and kill.

How does one identify one of the creatures exactly?

Well, thugs sport a certain kind of dress and live, predominantly, in Urban areas. They sell drugs and pimp hoes -- not because they have to, of course, but because they want to. Thugs are different from other human beings and should be hunted down and killed because they will kill YOU. Except that most of the crimes committed by these thugs are committed in their own communities. But that doesn't matter because they are MONSTERS and anything that happens to them they deserve. I mean, just look at them. Aren't they scary with their baggy pants and dreadlocked hairdos? They don't speak proper English. Lock them all up for petty drug offenses and throw away the key and then sit back and talk about the fact that all the Lady Thugs are unwed mothers.

There is a definition of thug that I found in the Urban Dictionary that I have found, in my experience, to be far more apt:

"A thug is someone who is going through struggles and has gone through struggles and continues to live day by day with nothing for them. That person is a thug, and the life they are living is a thug life."  

According to that definition, I am a thug and living a thug life. I write and write and write and receive nothing for the fifteen or so books I have published because ... I am ... not very good at this shit. Yea. That's it. Because 15 books in ... and I fucking suck. They just kept publishing me 'cause ... Well ... Reasons. Maybe it was the kindness of their cold, black hearts...

... that sounds about right.

Let's go with that.


I am a proud Thugesa and I will probably be shot tomorrow for saying that shit--but que sera sera. I've found more honor among thugs, honestly, than I have in dealing with the very least of the Industry people and other writers--as confused and fucked up and dead asleep as most thugs, unfortunately, are.

Distancing one's self from injustice because it doesn't directly affect you is a fool's play of the highest order. Labeling humans monsters because the media told you to, or because your grandpa did, is also a fool's play. Injustice doesn't have any stopping sense. ROBIN HOOD was a THUG. How long will it be before YOU try to stand up and someone with more power and authority knocks YOU down, labels you, and renders YOUR existence obsolete?

Tell me, Oh Struggling Soul, if you aren't also a thug by that second, and far more REAL. definition of the word?

"...a tiny fairy light on the Christmas Tree of Evil."
aka. Faux News

It was my only wish to rise Above these jealous COWARD motherfuckers I DESPISE


The Many Misdirections of "NEW" Feminism

 photo Storm_by_windrider-small_zpsc7d89340.png

This is my personal rant to be taken with a grain of salt.

The trend that feminism is taking has made me hate the word. More and more, it is becoming a bitter and hateful word--conflicted, confused, and misdirected by a bunch of petulant little girls who think they know what they're talking about. It is a disgusting, disheartening thing to watch.

Once upon a time, the word meant something important to females. In a world where some cultures cut off clits, and stone women for being raped, the word was like a beacon beckoning with hope for some form of equality among the genders. It was a helpful word in framing a world where no one is less by virtue of misfortune of birth. I've always been rather fond of it in a distanced sort of way that wasn't really distant at all. The word brought about change and a change for the better. All that bra burning was nice. A turn in the tide of commonplace domestic abuse was nice. Voting is nice -- the illusion that our votes make a difference anyway.

However, today's feminists are a running joke without a punchline--bitching and whining and passive aggressive bullying about everything. The 'free bleed' movement makes me want to stab kittens and I LOVE kittens. Frankly, I think that whole thing is just nasty on the same level as that scene from "To Sir With Love" where Sir walks into the class and there are  hastily and publicly removed tampons burning in the classroom's furnace. While there is nothing to be ashamed of about a natural human process, there is a pointlessness to the methods of this "movement" that I find truly cringe-worthy. Do we need, then, to allow all our necessary bodily functions to evidence themselves in public by allowing them to run down our legs? Or is that thought rather vile?

"Say it long and loud, I'm a bad bitch and proud" ... is one thing. This... is another.

I give great consideration to the fact that women used to be locked up in huts far away from the village when this time came for them. Such a thing was considered shameful and was reviled by the community. I understand all that, and still I say that there are ways to go about things... and this isn't the way. I get the point, but the method is overly dramatic and childish. That, and, these days, Ladies, we have much BIGGER problems that aren't being addressed. But I'll try to save that bitch and moan for another day, and talk instead about this video game bullshit that's been going on lately.

The big gripe was that women are underrepresented in video games and when they are represented they are overly sexualized playthings for the male players. As a person that plays ALOT of video games, I cry bullshit. There are many awesome video games filled with female personas kicking ass. If you truly give a shit, then you should know the answers already, and lots of people have put evidence up all over the net. If you're talking about a game like GTA, where all the dudes are macho and all the ladies are (kinda) whores -- a game I love except for the repetitive factor of the missions-- then you're gonna have to realize that GTA is an allover kind of fantasy where you can smash innocent people's heads in and steal their cars and run amok for no other reason than you've had a bad day and need to get out some aggression. Play Mass Effect or Dragon Age--beautiful engaging stories and something for every kind of person. Final Fantasy ANYTHING -- from 1-14. Saint's Row is Hella Fun For ALL. Get down with Lara Croft and stop trying to shave off her tits and make her look more like something you can stand to look at and not be jealous of. In other words, stop bitching about NOTHING, plz.

There's a lot to bitch about for real. Education in America sucks ass churning out more and more stupid, oblivious people. The government is after the right to have abortions making you a cow. Gay people still can't get married anywhere and anytime they want. The foster care system is losing children. Child abuse is running rampant. Racism is alive and well and eating at the core of out country keeping us from having a National Healthcare system like every other first world country in the world. Moving up the corporate ladder (or whatever ladder you may be on in fulfilling your dreams) still requires that you take off your panties and do a mean ass butt naked, hori-fuckin'-zontal snake dance for promotions. If you aren't married, you aren't a real woman. You better weigh 99 pounds soaking wet or you're a fat bitch...

I could go on...

...but I won't. The right to ... Ugh ... free bleed, and Who's Who in video games seems so ultra insignificant in the face of the problems I stated above. And, yet, these are some big ass topics in the realm of NEW feminism. What doors are being knocked down by this ... drivel? What brand of misogyny isn't laughing its collective ass off at ... this?

Think about this dumb shit in the looming future when some of the hard ass real life choices you have to face come into painful fruition.

Oh, and I'm not a feminist Old School or new. I'm a realist, if you must label my invisible ass anything at all.



rain on window pane photo: Summer Rain Summer_rain.gif


I am from a sketch book
From colored pencils and computers
I am from the tall building with the rose bushes
and the meows of my cat, Logan
I am from the green vines upon our windows
The lake and Pier

I'm from baking and artistic skill
From mother and father
I'm from laughing and playing games
And from fiendish delight

I'm from "We'll fix it together," and "I will always love you"
And the "Ghost Busters" tune
I'm from competitive gaming
I'm from the hospital and home
Nutella and omelets
From "The small girl who always went to 
the library to read." And her eyes never left the pages.  


Bird of My Feather

Long winged rider of sweet midnight breezes
Made of dreams, fears and fantasies
Flying high in the realm of pure imagination
Creating the sky that becomes your domain
Speaking in thunderclaps and soft whispers
Vivid colors and sweet aromas left in your wake
Unperceived by a world numbed to beauty
And comfortable in ignorance

Wingtips touch and inspiration ignites
As mirror images take flight
Identical opposites intertwined in midair
Most would never understand
They look up in admiration
But would want to destroy us if we flew too low
So higher ever higher we dance through the air
As long as this dream shall last


I didn't write either of these.. but they are both mine all the same.