I was watching something about world hunger being a social construct that bothered me, overall, with all the chaos that's going on in the media and what not. I do exist, after all, in a country where Donald Trump is running for president. The man steps forward as an undisguised asshole, and there are people that are going to vote for him no matter what vitriol spews out of his mouth. It would be disheartening if it wasn't so... normal, so very par for the course. I understand racism, hatred, selfishness and greed. I get them all. Since the cave, mankind has always been the same. We claim change, but we don't show it often. And we easily regress back to the cave when it's convenient and beneficial. Some would say that's what humans ARE.
I will neither agree nor disagree. What I wills say is that in a world with enough "stuff" for everyone, it is, simply, a shame that some are allowed to die due to starvation. We are born on a planet that is here for all of us, and we section off bits and claim them for ourselves and the group and whatever and watch children starve, allow children to grow up uneducated, allow a million and one atrocities to benefit select people and select groups, when doing the exact opposite would benefit the WHOLE. This is not the way that life is supposed to be. We are not living right and constantly wondering what's wrong. Its a weird thing to watch, and while I considered myself divorced from it, personally, for the moment, I can't help looking on in mute horror as humanity strays farther and father away from what I see as the 'mark'.
Love is easy, and it's not sexual (which it is often mistaken for). It is just ... love. I am broke. About as broke as a person can be. Somewhere in that broke-ness, there's a choice that I have made, and, while I don't intend to stay this way very much longer, I learned what kind of person I really am from it. And with that hard won lesson, I will do whatever it is that I am going to do in order to be the best kind of person that I can be. And try to help other people. And receive help from them. And live. Until I am not alive anymore. Its all there is, there is nothing else.
I can build myself a pyramid by fucking over others and taking theirs--and still not be happy. I could travel to Cancun every day and sleep with a million and one people and still not be happy. I could be Donald Trump and trick the poor, ignorant and racist by turning them on the weaker animal and rise to power so great one could liken it to godhood, and get my kicks sleeping with twelve year old hookers who are drug addicted runaways fleeing their molesting daddies--and still not be happy.
No one would know I wasn't happy. Everyone would see me having everything and think to themselves -- 'wow', I wish I was that guy'. And, maybe there'd be something in that for me as I regressed the world backward a couple of hundred years with my deep seeded insecurities and petty hatred that were eating me up because all my smiles were as fake as the money that makes me 'better' than everyone else.
But... that's not the road for me. I've kicked around the stones on the sidewalk of that particular path for awhile now and can't quite settle for it. I want a world where no one starves and everyone has a home, for starters. A world where they are not locking people up for an inability to pay traffic tickets and where the cops are held as accountable for their actions as all the other people. I want an educated world where people are trying to understand the mysteries, and a naturalistic world where people understand that we are part of this, not subject to it, and that we should be afraid because all this is US and we are IT. Where gay's okay and black's just fine, and so is yellow and red and, if they deigned to visit, green.
And yus, I probably won't get any of that--but that's okay too, which is really the point of the whole random spiel.
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Finished my Nano books a week ago, and while I called it meaningless in the previous post, it isn't. I did not follow Nano rules and upload for word count so that I could get my Nano award, but, then, I never do. This is the fifth time I've done Nano, and, again, I want to express my appreciation for the task. Whoever thought of it was one of those 'helpful' people, and I appreciate them for the addition to my collection of crap roaming around in my head being born. It takes the edge off--getting one of them done.
I have put a pause on the bit of nastiness I was writing for The Walking Dead as the grape vine hath proclaimed that Glen is not dying...yet. The show veers from the comic, and therefore, there is hope--not much, since it's The Walking Dead, but enough to give me pause and to cause me to turn to writing something else with vigor and my Walking Dead fanfic with a little less -- enthusiasm. It's bad when you put a character in a situation so twisted you actually feel a little bit sorry for them, eh? Plus, you have to walk through the damn thing with them, so... there's that. Currently, I am torturing someone else for fun...
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Some kid linked to one of my Google+. Noticed because that one has zero followers. And this kid's young. He was, I discovered looking for a different, younger, less cynical Raquel Taylor. My panic was really all based in: Go Away, Kid. Porn here!
And then I ran around a circle before realizing that I'm pretty harmless in my current state. Nothing to see and all that. I was pleased by the fact that shortie was undaunted by seeing two dudes kissing, which is my profile pic though. Might be raised right, that one:)
